It's been a while.

Sorry.

Like you care!

I've done all sorts of stuff since I last wrote. I moved back to cardiff, felt ridiculously homesick, cried into a teacup of gin (artist license), wore many a wig, sneakily found myself on a VIP balcony, got sick, worked,  enrolled on a french course (I start tomorrow and I am terrified), and turned 19. Again.

I've felt a bit trapped by everything. I didn't really want to be here and I didn't really want to be at home. (Hello Honesty). I can't really drop out of uni because its far too late in the game for me to give in now, I'm stubborn like that and where else am I going to go? I don't really feel with it at the moment. I'm hoping that throwing myself back into uni and signing up for random things like French lessons is going to help distract me from everything else and I can stop crying over things (hiding the gin might help too)and I can decide that I like awkward again because this week I'm not such a fan of it.

Simple playlist, stuff I have been listening to recently. I've fallen a bit in love with everything related to Diamond Rings and The D'urbervilles over the last few weeks...it's reflected quite a bit. Other things are songs that happen to have been playing at times, I wanted No Cars Go but spotify failed me (Well Done Arcade Fire, genuinely).

1. Show Me Your Stuff - Diamond Rings
2. I'm Good, I'm Gone - Lykke Li
3. On Fire - Neon Plastix
4. Hot Tips - The D'Urbervilles
5.Warhol's Portrait of Gretzky  - Hawksley Workman
6.Make it Gold - Ohbijou
7. Death to Los Campesinos! - Los Campesinos!
8. Cassius - Foals
9. Teqkilla - M.I.A
10. Crystalised - The XX


Gin in Teacups and Leaves on the Lawn
T xx

Meat.

I'm watching the VMA's and as a vegetarian and a fan of avant garde fashion I have something to say......

Gaga, if you are going to wear a dress made of meat at least make sure its a good dress.


(I have other views regarding the whole 'I'm not a piece of meat' issue but I frankly can't be bothered to express them coherently today)

t xx

Little Known Obsession.

For as long as I can remember I have done something that might be quite unusual. Well I have done a lot of things that might be quite unusual but we are just talking about one of them for now. Quite often I have discussed with people the things that you just couldn't live without and the things you never leave the house without and it always tends to be the same sorts of things, mobiles, keys, bank cards but there is one thing I have never revealed. For as long as I can remember I have rarely left the house with out this......

Sometimes when I am in a rush I forget to check my bag for it but usually it is there anyway left from the time before. If I am nervous or anxious about something I will check several times that it is in my bag or in my pocket just so that it is near to me. I'm not proud of it but I am quite a suspicious person and I know its ridiculous but if it keeps me happy I will probably keep on doing it, in the bag there are things that I think bring me luck and although some people know that I carry it with me (particularly when I travel somewhere) I don't think I have ever talked about the the things that are inside it. I write all sorts of nonsense on this blog and as I have failed recently I might as well put this on here to make up for it.

1. Little Ken.

Little Ken was the most recent addition to the bag (the bag which incidentally used to contain worry dolls, hello crazy people) and when I say recent I think I added it when I was doing my AS exams so that is about 4 years ago. I can't add stuff like that up so shoot me. He was given to me by my little brother to give me good luck and was named Little ken by my other brother after a character in the Mighty Boosh radio plays. He was briefly accompanied by a little blue sea but when I added him I messed up my A-levels and blamed that and so he had to go.

2. Rose.

The Rose was my Great Nan's and I was given to me when she died back in 2001, I used to wear it until the link in it broke and I was scared to wear it in case I lost it. Its old, I have no idea how old but its pre-ban ivory from South Africa where a lot of my Nan's family live and so its a connection to there as well. I still really miss my Nan and I never really got over loosing her so I like to sort of have a piece of her life with me when I travel. She used to say when I was little that I had been here before, its a phrase I have fallen in love with.

3. Rabbit.

I have had this Rabbit for luck for so long, I cant remember when I first got it. I remember taking it with me in my pocket to primary school so it has been going for a long time. Its heavier than it looks but the weight of it makes me aware that it is with me. I don't have an explaination for it really, its just something that I do.




Now you think that I have lost it I want to give you a playlist that makes me remember, it reminds me of two people in particular, one of whom I really realised that I was missing this week and can't really do anything about it. I wish I could put them in my pocket and carry them for good luck too.

Week 15 - Reminds Me of a Time

1. Don't Look Back Into the Sun - The Libertines
2. Decent Days and Nights - The Futureheads
3. Nobody Move, Nobody Get Hurt - We are Scientists
4. Mary - Subways
5. Illegal Tender - Louis XIV
6. Le Disko - Shiny Toy Guns
7. 22 Grand Job - The Rakes
8. Apply Some Pressure - Maximo Park
9. A Million Ways - OK Go
10. We Used To Be Friends - The Dandy Warhols

Also if anyone has stuck around this long or is even reading any of this I want to know if you have anything you always have to carry with you.

Trinkets and Luck,
t xx

Work.

I decided that if I couldn't think of anything exciting to write about I would just write about work, mainly because work really isn't that exciting. Not that I have done much recently.

Last week I returned to what I did for a whole year, temping. I'm not going to blow my own trumpet or anything but I am pretty nifty on a switchboard, pass me a switchboard and eventually I will forward your call, most likely to the wrong person or after quite a long time of you being on hold because I cant find the right number or person to put you through to. You get there eventually.

Anyway when I am at work I have a phone voice. Does everyone have a phone voice? I don't have it when I am using the phone normally I don't think, just when I am at work. The phone voice changes as well depending on who I am talking to and where I am working. Once I had to speak French on the phone to someone....well in France....who had called my office by accident, I had a really confused phone voice for that occasion. I even take the phone voice home with me sometimes and find myself answering my home phone with the intention of going "good afternoon, (insert company name), Natasha speaking, how can I help you?" which absolutely is not the way to answer the phone to your grandmother.

Sometimes when I am at work I get to listen to music. The job I currently have which has nothing to do with offices plays music all the time, sometimes this a curse as much as a musical blessing. Last week at work I had music on but the music played was essentially local radio aimed at middle aged women music and so I thought "hey that would make a brilliant playlist", obviously because it fits in with the rest of the music I have put on here previously. Now as a gift to you, I give you the opportunity to pretend you are at work with me so stick on your Britney Spears style headset, fetch a magazine, switchboard and cup of tea and stick on my "Desk Soundtrack".

1. Haven't Met You Yet - Michael Buble
2. You're Still the One - Shania Twain
3. Respect - Aretha Franklin
4. Patience - Take That
5. Truly Madly Deeply - Savage Garden
6. Breakfast at Tiffanys - Deep Blue Something
7. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2
8. When You Say Nothing at All - Ronan Keating

(tis 8, I failed at more.)

Good Afternoons and Telephones,
t xx

The curse of the multiple of 10.

I got to 39 post and the blog died but don't panic kidlings I was at work this week and brainstormed out at least two playlist and potentially have a third and so they shall be rocking up onto the internet at some point this weekend when I have finally put them allllll together and glued all the songs to each other with pritt stick.

I think I have forgotten how to do this. I don't really have anything to say. I guess I will just come back when I do.....

.........and..........
t xx

Rule Breaker.

Breaking the rules of my own blog yet again to do something new. This week instead of a playlist of songs that I have compiled I want to draw your attention to Trainwreck/Raincheck by Simon Bookish which has this week been made available to download by the man himself.

I have loved this album for a while but haven't really had a way to post it on here (without sneakily doing so in ways which are less than legal) and so now its about I want people to hear it. I think I like this album as much as I do because it is so very different to anything else I have on my mp3 player (that's right, I don't own an ipod, don't ask) and it definitely needs committing to on your first listen but when you do you find all these lovely little sounds, phrases and references. It is nice to put on and shut out the world listening to the surreal lyrics and stories told which almost reflect poetry more than simple pop lyrics. So definitely go and listen to it.

I am now presented with a really tempting opportunity to link into the next thing I want to write about now but we all know that this blog is usually a jauntily awkward gathering of thoughts so why change it now. Last week I went to see Patrick Wolf again (go try and google that link) which was as always fabulous and was especially nice to hear old songs bought back which I doubted I would hear live again or at all. This Weather never fails to make me have that grinning like an idiot feeling. I might add some pictures to this at a later point but currently the camera is upstairs and I am far too lazy to go fetch it.

Trainwrecks and Grinning,
t xx

Wide awake

I don't really have much to type out this week. I'm writing this out two days early at half past four in the morning so the likelihood of me even remembering that I wrote it is pretty low let alone remembering to press post.

This weeks play list is one that should be played loudly. I myself have been playing it quite loudly as I compiled it because when is a better time to have a dance party than when you have been rudely woken up at two in the morning and the person who did so is trying to sleep. Bitter, me? Noooooooo.


Week 13 - If I Can't Sleep You Can't Sleep Either.

1.Odessa - Caribou
2. Count in Fives - The Horrors
3. XXXO - M.I.A
4. Prick Tease - Neon Plastix
5. Swords Of Truth - These New Puritans
6. Focker - Late of The Pier
7. Celebrate Your Mother - Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster
8. Robot L.O.V.E. - Alec Empire
9. Fuck the Pain Away - Peaches


And then not on the playlist but also used in my evenings dance party (because I went on Neon Plastix and got a bit nostalgic) I give you....

10. Stop The Pop - PsychoFags in BinBags



Preacher Man and Morning from the wrong side,

t xx

Houses.

The other day when taking a walk to the train station I realised that on my route I actually passed 4 houses that I have lived in. During the walk I was then thinking about all the houses that I have lived in, I wouldn't say it was a freakishly high number but I would say that it was probably higher than average for someone who is 21. I wanted to make a playlist of songs that reflect this and tell you something about those houses.

House 1 - The House I Lived In Until I Was 7.
I lived here until my parents got divorced, it was the house my grandparents lived in when they first got married and it was 3 doors down from the house that my great grandparents lived in. I think my mom was born in this house and then when she and my dad got married my grandparents moved out and they had the house. My dad still lives there so technically so do I, it would be weird if strangers lived in that house now.

House 2 - Casa de Grandparents.
I've lived in this house short term several times, when my parents first split up and on other occasions like when my mom has been in hospital. I have memories of travelling to school from here and it taking what seemed like forever and having to get up so early that I would fall asleep in the car on my way there only to be woken by my grandad when it was time for school.

House 3 - The House Full of Kids.
For a few weeks or maybe it was months, I cant really remember we lived with one of my mom's friends and her family. She had 3 kids and then plus me and my brother there were five of us, at the time it seemed like there were loads of us but I knew nothing of what was ahead at that point. I can't really remember much from this house other than having to get the bus lots to get to places.

House 4 - Lodgers.
After that house we moved in with a different friend of my mom's who had a room free in her house. My brother moved back with my dad for a short while at this point and it was me, mom, her friend and her lodger. He was Glaswegian and I never really got what he said but I coped. My Mom always describes that time as being a bit abfab and reflecting on it now I can totally see why.

House 5- Ghosts.
Years later and I still think this house was haunted on the plus side though we did have a playroom which when you are 8 or 9 is like the best thing ever regardless of if Casper is your room mate. That house also had a spiral stairs which still to this day I hate, maybe because I was forever falling down them and they really hurt.

House 6 - Alleyways and House Parties.
This might have been my favourite place when I was little. It was just my mom, my brother and me in our house with various add ons at times. We had a little black cat called Monpetit, several guinea pigs and a rabbit and everything was nice. I fell over lots and broke my arm and and I once got locked in a wardrobe, still I loved it.

House 7 - Extended Family.
Tonight I don't count some people in that and sometimes I still live here.

House 8 - Halls.
My first time living alone was at Uni, it was like having my own little bubble away from chaos. My flatmates and I were never really close but I guess I had a lot of experience of that anyway.

House 9 - Last Year.
Last year I lived with 5 people who I wanted to live with, we had a fridge of shame/fame and occasionally had ridiculous times. We were also a pretty good quiz team.

House 10 - Next Year
I just moved into House 10, so far I have only really had 4 days there but from what I can tell I like it and can't wait to move in properly. As I don't have a song for this one yet its going to be a future house song.


Week 12 - Houses.

This might be the strangest collection of songs I have put together to date but each one reminds me of a house in order. Sorry.

1. Domino Dancing - Pet Shop Boys
2. Moonlight Serenade - Glenn Miller
3. Basketcase - Green Day
4. Absolutely Fabulous - Mask
5. Love is All Around - Wet Wet Wet
6. Barbie Girl - Aqua
7. DJ's Got a Gun - Robots in Disguise
8. The Magic Position - Patrick Wolf
9. Cry Me a River - Michael Buble
10. Country House - Blur

Moving and Nostalgic Walking,
t xx

Less than 3, More than 60.

Today, well yesterday but lets not be pedantic, I went to a meal for my, well I guess, Step-grandparents diamond wedding anniversary. As much as I whined about having to be at a family reunion that I'm not really part of I had to go just because 60 years is a ridiculously long amount of time. Its weird to think that they were already married when they were my age and that they have been together for almost three times as long as I have been alive. I cant even remember last week properly let alone try and comprehend 60 years worth of memories with someone.

I've never really been sure of my opinion of marriage and at 21 its something that other people do, occasionally people I know but no so commonly which is nice as it doesn't scare me as much then. Thinking about this in a week when I have cried more than once or twice because I have felt let down or just because I have felt isolated scares me a little because although I'm not looking for the love of my life at the moment I just want people who are constants in my life rather than people who I am eventually no longer relevant to. I went to see Inception and I guess what I want is a totem.

So this week to counteract last weeks (well fridays but again with the being a pedant) list of music to make you want to sit in a dark room and this weeks blogging I want to give you a list of love in musical form. Songs that I one day want to be relevant.

<3
1. Enchanted - Patrick Wolf
2. Made Up Lovesong #43 - Guillemots
3. First To Know - Mystery Jets
4. Love Song - Tilly and The Wall
5. When I Go - Slow Club
6. Toothpaste Kisses - The Maccabees
7. VCR - The XX
8. Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
9. Well, Love Does Furnish A Life -  Fyfe Dangerfield (Larrikin Love)
10. The Modern Love - Bloc Party (I wanted the Final Fantasy cover of this)
11. I Do - Placebo

Diamonds and Dreams,

T xx

Well.

 I've been home for two weeks now and it's starting to get to me. I love being home for a visit and I love spending time with my family but sometimes it gets ridiculously boring and then when things get boring I get lonely. I miss being able to just wander off and get away from everything or just go and pester someone to entertain me for a while. I miss my other life. I live to0 far away from stuff to just go a wander and the friend situation here isn't the greatest and sometimes I feel like I am treading on eggshells far too much.

Two weeks at home have made me a whinger and so I'm going to bring you all down to my level this week with my playlist called "Let Me Bring You Down", it reflects the days when I just want to sit around and have a bit of a cry and feel sorry for myself. Well, er enjoy?

1. Knife - Grizzly Bear
2. Train Under Water - Bright Eyes
3. Not Ready To Love - Rufus Wainwright
4. What He Wrote - Laura Marling
5. Ari's Song - Patrick Wolf (this really should be replaced by a different track but spotify didn't have it and I'm not sure I want it on this list anyway)
6. Flowers and Silence - Sneaker Pimps
7. Abandoning - Parenthetical Girls
8. Creature Fear - Bon Iver
9. Biko - Bloc Party

I think I need a hug.

t xx

Musical Roadtrip.

Its a playlist that is meant to be topical as the day that I was intending on posting it was in fact American Independence Day. It obviously isn't anymore yet I feel the independence still goes on so hey lets make all the time an celebration (but not for me and I am English and one day that old empire will be reinstated and it shall be mine, just letting you know!).

Theme this week is American Songs which Mention American Places.

1. USA Boys - Health
2. Chicago (Multiple Personality Disorder Version) - Sufjan Stevens
3. New York City Cops - The Strokes
4. Williamsburg Will Oldham Horror - Jeffrey Lewis
5. Shores of California - The Dresden Dolls
6. San Francisco Song - Camera Obscura
7. Colorado - Grizzly Bear
8. American - The Soft Pack
9. Pittsburgh - We Are Scientists
10. California English - Vampire Weekend.

(i'm struggling with themes ok??)

blah and blah
t xx

60, 16, 16, 19, 64, 61, 18, 89, 91......

Oooh moving time is getting closer and I'm getting all impatient. I spent the day packing up my room and lets not even go anywhere near the number of shoes involved as its a hideous yet lovely number. The packing however does mean that I can make excuses that sound a lot like I have been busy but really mean that I lacked inspiration, but fear not my lovely reader (lets be honest here and not use the plural) as this week the playlist isn't coming from me and I'm pretty sure there isn't an accordion in sight (sighs of relief).

In the bastardised words of children's television this playlist is bought to you by the letters               R, O, and B and I shall now hand over the reigns of my blog shaped baby to him.

"In a movie about my life Jodie Harsh (or Marsh) would play myself and I’ve always fancied Macaulay Culkin as my long lost drug addicted cousin. Then add in Val Kilmer as the annoying ex and Marilyn Manson who drives my roller disco truck. We not only have a sequel to ‘Party Monster’ but the biggest cinematic flop since ‘Doogal’. Each and every song in this playlist will feature in the soundtrack of my blockbuster from ‘Maniac’ as my title music to, my favourite hot mess, Chanelle’s ‘I Want It’ when I go on a murderous rampage. Some songs are new, some are old and others are just some hot tasty remixes. Enjoy!!"

1.  Finally 2008 (Kam Denny & Paul Zala Remix)- CeCe Peniston
2.  Back to Black- Amy Winehouse
3.  Movie Star- Roisin Murphy
4.  Maniac- Flashdance
5.  About a Girl- Sugababes
6.  Telephone (Brad Walsh Remix)- Lady Gaga & Beyonce
7.  Jump (Axwell Remix)- Madonna
8.  Junkyard (Vandalism Remix)- The Potbelleez
9.  Huddle Formation- The Go! Team
10. Money (That’s What I Want)- The Flying Lizards
11. Sex Dwarf- Softcell
12. I Want It ( 7th Heaven Dance Radio Mix)- Chanelle Hayes
13. Hardcore Girls- The Count and Sinden
14. Wishing (If I had a photograph of you)- A Flock of Seagulls
15. Gettin’ Over You- David Guetta; Chris Willis ft Fergie & LMFAO
16. Don’t You Want Somebody to Love- Jefferson Airplane
17. Sex Raptor- Horse the Band
18. Mr Lover- Joe Worricker
19. You’ve Got The Love- The Source ft. Candi Staton
20. La Rock 101- Vitalic

Despite the fabulous playlist Robert I'm still heartbroken that I seem to have no place in your trashy cinematic masterpiece.

I shall leave you with this and a song that currently lives on repeat (as if I'd write a blog without leave my musical fingerprints all over it)

79 and 54,

t xx

Defining.

Over the last few weeks I have been giving quite a lot of though to definitions of people. When  I was at school it was quite easy, there were the scary kids who usually fell into the newspaper definition of chavs who you only ever saw when crossing a smoky line of them at the back of the school while hoping not to get your head kicked in,  the emos which used to be the greebos or goths and they generally hung round in corners or doorways redoing their make up of pretending to be obsessed with death. The sporty kids who generally werent seen in social times because they were hanging round in changing rooms or whatever it was they did (can you tell I didnt really get close enough to them to find out) and the nerds who sat in whichever classroom was free or the library trying not to be the target of any of the others.

I think at school I kinda sat in between the emo kidlings and the nerdy ones. I did fail anything and I never toyed with the idea of self harm but I definitely wore a lot of black and had big green hair. I was like a nerdy emo....who liked electro.

These last few weeks I have had to face up to something that I thought I had left behind me at school but people still most definitely have these groups, they just change as we grow up. I had a time in my gap year working where the groups just didn't seem to apply but now I know that really I was just working on what I was about to turn into. Sure I still wear a lot of black and I'm still a nerd but I have used my nerdery to move onto foreign cinema and photography, reading books by famous authors because of the prestige of reading them and listening to bands people have rarely heard of and I do it all while wearing a pair of my moms glasses from the late 70's. Thats right this emo seems have come out of her cocoon to become a ridiculous hipster.

I read up on hipsters quite a lot on the internet recently and apparently by even acknowledging their exisitence I can't even be one. Does this make me something worse....like a hipster wannabe? I have the credentials it seems, I drink lattes and keep a blog but when I am out an see the people who are more hipster than I, I get a bit scared. I think I'm just going to continue with it though and maybe one day I'll either stop crying at Michael Cera films because they relate to how I want my life to be or I will completely submerge myself in this and move to Toronto to become a vegan artist.

Groups and Wannabes.

t xx

A girl cannot live on This Morning alone.

This week has been tough to come up with a theme and for quite a while I had absolutely no ideas whatsoever. I feel like next week could be similar. Its most likely down to the fact that I haven't really had all that much to do and spent quite a lot of time on my own.  All this free time and lack of money is starting to drive me a little bit crazy, a girl cannot live on this morning and loose women alone. Empty house however has meant that the ukulele has come out and so have the hilariously folky versions of pop songs and so the playlist this week has been inspired by the songs that I like to mindlessly play on my uke (it might also be the strangest combination of songs yet).

1. Alejandro - Lady Gaga
2. Gonna Get Along Without You Now - She & Him
3. MIA - Emmy The Great
4. Womanizer - Britney Spears
5. Alas I Cannot Swim - Laura Marling
6. Penzance - Patrick Wolf
7. Eleanor Put Your Boots On  - Franz Ferdinand
8. Fight For This Love - Cheryl Cole
9. Elephant Gun - Beirut
10. 5 Years Time - Noah and The Whale


I need to do something creative.


Daytime TV and walking with headphones,

t xx

I should change it's name...

The idea of this blogging music thing was to post a playlist every Sunday, in several weeks I think I have achieved this once. Maybe I should call it the 'at some point in the week when I feel like it' playlist. It has however made me write more than I was to begin with, normally I would have gone months sometimes without writing anything but over the past few weeks I have managed to write quite regularly and think about the music that I might be listening to that week.

I have decided that I'm not going to mention that its not Sunday again as every blog seems the start like this at the moment and its not very interesting.

Today I want to write about duvet music. I hope this is a phrase I have invented just for the purpose of this blog but I'm going to google it now and check....nope nothing that has an alternative meaning, I did however find some jedward duvet covers. Duvet music is the phrase I use to describe the songs that sometimes sound better first thing in the morning when you don't want to move sit wrapped up in bed for a while just thinking about nothing. It's music that suits the days when the sun is streaming through the blinds not letting you sleep but equally the days when the music is almost drowned out by the rain hitting the glass of the bedroom window.

Since finishing my exam (i'd use the plural because it sounds better but that would be lying) and essays I seem to have had more and more time for duvet music. Days where I have nothing happening so will quite happily sit through a whole album before facing the world, to be honest the last few days I could just sit and work through the entirety of  record collection before having to do things because for the last few days I have had absolutely nothing to do. Its a week and a half until moving day and this is like the boring calm before the storm in which I have absolutely nothing to do. I'm sure I will find something new to write about over the weekend as I will be going a little mad with the boredom and my own company.

On with the playlist - Duvet Music.

1. Lemonade - CocoRosie
2. Lewis' Dream - Owen Pallett
3. I am the Rain - Peter Doherty
4. The Swan - Bishi
5. Your Ex-Lover is Dead - Stars & Final Fantasy
6. We are Nowhere and It's Now - Bright Eyes
7. Baby, That's Not the Point - The Drums
8. Splinter - Sneaker Pimps
9. Don't Be Shy - Fyfe Dangerfield
10. Wind in the Wires - Patrick Wolf

Beds and Boredom,

t xx

alright, alright...

I'll admit it, I forgot!! I think the main reason is that I actually compiled my playlist earlier in the week as well as most of next weeks because I knew I would be busy over the weekend but then completely forgot to actually write anything to go with it. Even this is now being written on my blackberry because I am currently cooking while blogging, I just keep thinking about writing it up at really inappropriate times.

This weeks inspiration for the blog is the same reason I have for forgetting to post it on the sunday. Sunday I was at home because it was my mom's birthday. I had a ridiculous coach journey home after only 2 hours sleep following a really long shift at work and the coach driver called me cheap. Unimpressed face. Anyway I reckon my mom is the one responsible for a large part of my love for music, when I was little I was hardly ever listening to music like the spice girls but I was stealing my moms cds instead. 80's music is something that we bond over now and so I felt it was only right to make a playlist of just that....


Week 5 - Stealing from your parents record collection

1. Love Action - Human League
2. Smalltown Boy - Bronski Beat
3. Are 'friends' Electric - Gary Numan
4. Stand and Deliver - Adam and The Ants
5. You Spin Me Round (Like a Record) - Dead or Alive
6. West End Girls - Pet Shop Boys
7. People are People - Depeche Mode
8. Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) - Eurythmics
9. Love on Your Side - Thompson Twins
10. Temptation - Heaven 17
11. Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?  - Culture Club  (added for those who know the story)

Coaches and synthesisers

T xx

Yesterday...

I saw something and went 'oh I think I'm going to write about that'

Today....

I have no idea what it was so if anyone knows let me know.


Forget me nots and elephants,

t xx

I'm opening this blog on this note......

and then not mentioning it again until the end.

Also I want to point out that this week its actually a Sunday. I was wondering when creating my playlist why it had come around so quickly this time and then I remembered how late I was writing last week, its not even as if I can say tis because I have been busy because I've not. I've been so very bored. I'm so bored I just found myself watching my clothes go round and round in the washing machine. That said I'm also not feeling very inspired. 

Soooo whats happened this week (also known as the things I have done to distract myself from the fact I have nothing to do), house trip to the valleys (read safari), an adventure to Bristol during which I didn't get lost (admittedly its one train), made my blog look different....approve?, got fabulous marks back from my photographs module, drank cheap wine in boots while Lucy had scary make up put on her. So pretty much the usual. 

This week I also found the time to become addicted to The United States of Tara, I don't know why I started watching it other than I probably had nothing to do but I'm so glad I did. I cannot wait now to see how the end of the second series is going to turn out. 

On a note of television this week I have to mention Lost. Sometimes it felt like I was the only person watching towards the end and I can most definitely see why, I think I was only watching just so I could reach the end of it. Some weeks I would fast forward through the boring bits and then get even more confused. I liked the end though, predicted by many but still possibly the best feasible option for the writers to go with, I should stop lying,  I was just glad to see Charlie. 

For a sunday music blog this got awfully televisiony so I am going to swiftly link it by just yelling the word EUROVISION. Its bad, its cheesy, its not really music but I love it, always have done. I remember being little and getting sent to bed before it finished because it was on too late and then waking up the next morning and the first thing I thought of was "who won?". I still get a bit like that but some years its because I have drunk too much to remember who won and then woke up with cheesy europop stuck in my head. 

Quite obviously this weeks theme can only be Eurovision. 

1. Making Your Mind Up - Bucks Fizz 

2. Divine - Sebastian Tellier

3. Ovo je Balkan - Milan Stankovic (for Rachel)

4. Fairytale - Alexander Ryback

5. Wolves of the Sea - Pirates of the Sea

6. Pokusaj - Laka

7. Allez Olla Ole - Jessy Matador

8. Diva - Dana International

9. Flying the Flag - Scooch

10.Dancing Lasha Tumbai - Verka Serduchka

Nil Point et Danzing

t xx

 

Does anything ever really change?

I was just looking back through a blog from a far off land where I found a description of myself I had written about 3 years ago, maybe even longer than that. It seems to be an about me but reading through it I realise that none of it seems to have changed all that much. Have I not changed or have the lies not changed, I don't think I care.

"I only really feel the need to write down the things that annoy me. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate the world so much I have loads of little annoyances to write down in fact its quite the opposite. I Believe its these little annoyances that help make the world interesting. Where would I be without people watching and the things that annoy me so much they become funny.

I have always been described as quite cynical and although I am only 18 I have the whingey grumpy attitude of a pensioner. I don't like drinking until I'm sick, hanging out in parks with a bottle of cider, and collecting Asbos. I don't smoke, I don't take drugs, I never lie to my parents, and basically I'm a right little goody two shoes and I like it that way. I don't think I'm dull or boring in fact I'm quite the opposite, or at least I have an imagination that makes up for it.

Im not too keen on other teenagers. Most of them scare me until I get to know them, even then there are a lot that still scare me. I try not to be arrogant and am nice to all people but sometimes I realise that I am smarter than many of them which gets to me. I had to work to be intelligent, I listened hard and put in the effort. I think most people who are thick are just a bit lazy.
There goes my claim to not being arrogant.

I'm not though. I wrote my personal statement for university earlier and I had the exact same problem that I did when I wrote my original. I can write pages and pages of negative aspects about myself but I find it really hard to find my positives. Im under-confident, quite insular, geeky, I pretend to be posher than I really am (in fact I come from a fabulous working class background and for a few months of my life I lived out of a suitcase. I don't admit that much...I have moved on since then, maybe thats why im a snob....I like where I am now and dont fancy going back too much). Im not pretty but I try to look unique in order to disguise that, Im not sure it does. Sometimes I find myself disagreeing with people just to be awkward. I regret not acting younger when I was younger but now I feel quite stuck in my ways and my conscience doesn't let me break to many rules.

I feel like I have only recently started being me. I used to worry a lot about what people would think of me, I reckon that's just what school does to people. Since I left I have felt more confident with who I am, my strange ways of thinking and looking. I will talk to strangers but I'm not as good at talking to people I have to talk to again with a few exceptions. I don't have many close friends but the ones I do have know who they are and that I would be completely lost without them. I miss people who I don't often see any more. I'm not too keen on chasing peoples friendships, it should be mutual. I don't have time for people who don't do this.

I worry about things a lot. I'm amazed no one has put my prozac yet for this. I worry about war, climate change, and general consequences of my actions in life. I think this is why I don't sleep very well at night."

I also found this classic moment from my writing down whatever was on my mind days

""Orlando Bloom is knocking on your door and saying we are going out on a hot date,what the Chinese takeaway are you going to wear?"

WHAT THE CHINESE TAKEAWAY??? that's exactly what I would like to know. I take everything back what I said earlier...Gok just got it wrong, brown skirt made of trousers, navy blue polka dot scarf made into a bolero and a light pink t-shirt. Its just not working. They are blurring out the addidas logo on Goks jacket.....but I saw it not long ago, that's how I know its addidas. I also love the way that he adds his name to descriptions "Gok land" "Gok Shock".....I wish I could do that with my name."

Honesty and Nostalgia,

T xx

L-a-t-e

Its Tuesday. I have no excuses.

I'm also failing at spotify this week.

Cover Versions Week. Inspired by a train journey with track 1 on repeat for about half an hour.

Army Dreamers - Patrick Wolf (Kate Bush)

Peach Plum Pear - Owen Pallett (Joanna Newsom)

Bleeding Love - Mystery Jets (Leona Lewis)

Xanadu - Lightspeed Champion (Olivia Newton John)

Dancing With Myself - Nouvelle Vague (Generation X)

Brain Damage - Jeffrey Lewis and Laura Marling (Emimen)

What a Waster - Adam Green (The Libertines)

Hallelujah - Beirut (Leonard Cohen)

One Man Guy - Rufus Wainwright with Martha Wainwright and Teddy Thompson (Loudon Wainwright)

20th Century Boy - Placebo (T-rex)

10! It took forever and as a cheeky bonus (mainly for Rob as I know he is eagerly refreshing this page....don't even pretend you weren't) I shall include what may be the greatest cover version of our time.....

Better and Worse,

T xx

Don't stand on the seat...shhhhh.

As the persistant rule breaker of my own blog I shall be posting my sunday playlist on a saturday, I do have 10 songs this week though. I'm eventually getting there.

This week has been a busy one, I saw Florence and the Machine, Fell in love with The Drums, offended one of my oldest friends, Did a lot of revision, had an exam, went to an 80's disco and most importantly spent about 7 hours on trains. Not my personal highlight but the inspiration for this weeks playlist.

I have a bit of thing about ending up in the 'quiet zone' of the train filled with grumpy looking business men and old people who just want peace and quiet. I only ever discoverthis once I have sat down and then I feel awkward moving, and although I always keep as quiet as I can I generally get glared at like I got on the train with a one man band set up, something about me (possibly because i am neither old or a business person) implies that I would struggle with the concept of quiet. They would be right.

The playlist this week is a list of songs I discovered on my mp3 player which turned out inappropriate for the quiet zone, mainly because the only acceptable thing to do with them is turn them up louder or dance around the carriage like the one man band I am much to the disgust of the sleeping old man I have ended up sitting next to. So heeeeeere goes........

Week 2 - One man bands and feet on seats.

1. Common People - Pulp
2. Banned from The Roxy - Jeffrey Lewis
3. Two Doors Down - Mystery Jets
4. The Boyfriend Song - Gentleman Reg
5. Steal All You Can Motherfucker - The Hidden Cameras
6. Golden Phone - Micachu and The Shapes
7. Saddest Summer - The Drums
8. Bad Weekend - Art Brut
9. Get Paid Smash Up Mix - Robots in Disguise/Rhythm King and Friends
10. Cellphone's Dead - Beck (Jamie Lidell Mix)

horrible keyboards and trains,
t xx

Ponderings.

Apparently ponderings isn't a word. I don't care right now I like it, it seems to sum up everything I want to write right now and so it shall just have to do.

I haven't been writing. I could say I have been particularly for for the majority of the last few months it's a blatant lie. I had essays and things but only two and a scrapbook and that doesn't take the entirety of February, March and April. Three months of no blogging. I twitter but I guess I have just been too lazy to write anything longer than 140 character.

I think another reason I stopped is because I began to think why the fuck am I writing this? It seems the main reason is for me just to get my thoughts down on paper (there isn't actually paper involved but I guess I know what I mean) and so if I am doing that why am I doing it in a public space. It's like writing a diary and then leaving it open somewhere hoping that someone will come and pick it up and read it. In my head it's all essentially attention seeking, however if I am attention seeking (someone did tell me the other day and I acted like I needed constant attention...you know who you are) do I really want attention for being a whingey bitch? It was around this point that I decided that I wanted more than bitching. I want to write about stuff I like and a constant in the group of stuff I like which has been there all my life (things like crimping my hair and gingham will come and go) was music and so without further ado I introduce 'Playlist Sunday' (a better name might come along in time or I might lose interest in it before then, I don't have the best track record).

Playist sunday will consist of every week compiling a playlist relating to a theme, sometimes relevant to the week that has preceded it, sometimes relevant to whatever word is hovering around in my head. Probably some weeks the theme will be thrown out the window because I have been too lazy to think of a theme and just threw together a list of 10 songs that I like. Speaking of music I like, I make no apologies that the list are pretty much made up of songs I have been momentarily obsessed with.

I'm going to make this moment more momentous than it needs to be as I'm the only person who cares and I already know what is on the playlist but drumroll pleaseeeee.

*Imagined drum roll*

Week 1 - Where are we going?

The week of uneasy uncertainty in relations to elections and more person where on earth am I going feelings.

1. Albion - Babyshambles
2. Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want - She & Him
3. Is It Wicked Not To Care - Belle and Sebastian
4. Swim Until You Can't See Land - Frightened Rabbit
5. Cross Your Fingers - Laura Marling
6. A New Sense Of Humour - Simon Bookish
7. Hard Times - Patrick Wolf
8. Downing Street Kindling - Larrikin Love
9. Country House - Blur


I'm already breaking my own rules, what's that 9 tracks rather than 10? oooh you are such a rebel....it had nothing to do with the fact I couldn't come up with another and didn't want to spend ages thinking about it or anything. Just a sign of things to come.


Whys and Wheres
t xx

Belated.

For quite a while I have written one of these summaries of the year type things but this year the first month of 2010 has zoomed past my eyes, so on an evening in which I am meant to be sleeping as I have work tomorrow I have decided to try and compile one.

2009 was all about....

Coffee, Libraries, A Certain White Kitten, Considering buying purple hair dye, Not going to Britain's Got Talent, A disaster phone and it's medieval replacement, Signing for a house, Missing Maria, Robert Webb in a leotard, Man on Wire, Cinema Times, Leek flavoured ice cream, So come and dance with me Michael, Patrick Wolf, Tilda Swinton, Bulgarians and Greeks, Pokemon, Nazis outside of pet shops,Micachu and The Shapes, Come Dine With Me, Tunnels, Christmas in April, Churches in Penarth, Swine Flu, Magical Orbs, Star Trek, Jonathan from Spotify, this quotation "i found myself rather attracted to a man in bondage gear with a viola tonight", the Nottingham to Cardiff Cross Country Service, Baftas and Red carpets, Simon Bookish, The Baconator, Peter Berlin, Sexy and Informative, The Aquabus, Super Hide and Seeker Rory, Final Fantasy, Summer Ball, Moving House, Tate Modern, Transformers Premier, Bad Lookalikes, Paul Gambaccini, Being taller than Dermot O'Leary, Epic Msn conversations, Crying at Sci Fi, Huge Glasses, Car Showrooms, Windows the Hamster, Wigs, Decorating, Ukuleles, Wearing Fancy Dress in train stations, Flasher Statues, Harriet the Spy, Purple Rain, Owen Pallett, Geeks, Vivienne Westwood, Doc Martens, Double vodka Man, Stars are Blind, baked beans and peas, Derek The Weatherman, John and Edward, Hideous Cardigans, Megabus vs all other modes of transport, The London Palladium, Pass the Spray, House Hunting, Tea, Placebo, Men and Models, AND FINALLY MY GRANDMA SINGING ALONG TO SHE WOLF.

Did I get everything?

To all in 2009 and things to come in 2010,

t xx

Amendments.

My last post was tagged with "Keep your creepy sparkly dead men away from me", I'd like to point out that its less a problem with sparkles, more a problem with dead and creepy. To be honest in my book sparkles are probably a bonus.

Something and something,

t xx

"Everytime she opened her mouth I felt women take a step backwards"

Last night I finally got round to seeing New Moon but as I left the cinema amongst gaggles of girls discussing how fit edward cullen was I couldn't help but feel I had missed something. Later I realised that maybe that film was one of the most terrifying films I had seen in a while.

I read the books. Didn't everyone read the books? They weren't Shakespeare, in fact I feel The Hungry Caterpillar had more complex sentences, but it was entertaining never the less. It was cheesy and unreal and I read it presuming that was what everyone thought when reading it. I even got all the way to the last book before about half way through I questioned what I had done and realised the entire story had reached a new level of ridiculous, then I threw it away and proceeded to forget the story.

Then when Twilight was release I was forced to revisit it. As far as I remember I enjoyed the film as much as I could, i was distracted by visuals and music and most of all hype. It took a second film and the hype of teenagers everywhere to remind me why I actually really don't like this. I do not like at all.

The main problem I have with the series is Bella. Its nothing to do with the flat acting that Kristen Stewart is so frequently accused of its how flat the character is. How is it possible to portray a character that only actually has two dimensions? I pity her if anything. What worries me is the way in which girls aspire to be like Bella, to have a vampire and a werewolf fighting over her, to find this perfect love that you cant live without. She embodies the typical awkwardness of a teenager and the need for acceptance but really she she is nothing more than a shell. Edward may as well be chasing after a picture of a girl for the amount of personality she is shown to have. New Moon demonstrated this to me, disguised as missing Edward she falls apart until she has another guy to lust after. She is nothing more than a damsel in distress dressed in modern clothing, and while that worked in fairy tales no girl should ever aspire to that. What ever happened to being equals girls? Did Girl Power teach you nothing?

That was the main problem I had but there was something else I found kind of creepy. How old is Bella? 18. How old is Edward? 17? No wait 109. He might look pretty but that most definitely is a creepy age difference. Its not as if this isn't bought up either yet the characters seem to completely ignore this. He is manipulative about it as well with that whole you must marry me thing. No one describes it as romantic when someone is well and truly under the thumb and I refuse to see this in the film. It was never romantic, he sneaks into her room and watches her sleep, he practically blackmails her into marrying him. If anything Bella should be getting herself a restraining order rather than planning a wedding, yet its all forgive because he is pretty and sparkly. The idea of vampires (don't get me started on that) in this film is that they are beautiful which lures in their victims...or in this case captive women.

I know its just a film but there are far too many people I know who have a crush on Edward Cullen. The film is aimed at girls who are likely to be getting into their first relationships and that's not a good view of the world to have. I wouldn't have a problem with thinking Robert Pattinson is hot, but when someone turns to me and goes "I don't really see it when he is being himself, but when he is Edward its a a different matter" I want to scream. Goodbye being equals, Hello sparkly dead men.

Vampires and Rants,

t xx